You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
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