Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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