I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
Randomize
