im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize