i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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