I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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