I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
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