the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
Less talking, more tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Randomize