Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
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