Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
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