Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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