Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize
