You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Randomize
