OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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