I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
My vagina just recognized that song.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Randomize
