I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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