i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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