all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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