alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize
