And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Randomize