I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
