the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
Randomize
