WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize