Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
