you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Randomize
