Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize