It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize