so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
please come you make the beer taste better
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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