he puts the penis in happiness.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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