Where did you get a picture of my penis
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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