Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Randomize
