WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Randomize
