At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Randomize
