What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
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