You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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