lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Randomize