Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Randomize
