I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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