just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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