I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
