you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
