just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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