Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
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