I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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