You just made me feel so damn special
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
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