Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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