I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Randomize
