Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
