hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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