i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Randomize
